Renovatio

Spring is here. It’s nice to be able to think about stuff, rather than have professors do the thinking for me (not that I’m coming up with any grand answers to the questions of universe). It’s a good time to drive around, listen to music, enjoy the weather, and reflect on what I thought about things exactly one year ago, when I was in the thick of it.

Until today, I felt guilty about squandering time doing nothing but absorbing music. Why? What else would I be doing that’s really accomplishing anything? Psh. Screw it; no matter what I do, I feel like I wasted my time, so I might as well try to enjoy it.

I got sick this week for the first time since moving from Bowling Green. That’s a new record! I had a good run… probably a clean bill of health since June. Not even so much as a minor cold. And that’s exactly what I had. It came on Wednesday, mostly following arch form while using Bartok’s Golden Mean. I feel like I could take on the whole Empire myself.

Meanwhile, while it’s spring outside, we composers all seem to be going through a winter season. There’s a general malaise among… uh… three of us?

I won’t speak for the others. For my part, I am extending my “break” into a hiatus from composition. There are many, many, many reasons for this. I wouldn’t really call it a sabbatical, but… wait, no. Sabbatical. Yeah, that’s about what it is. Existentialism is knocking on my door, and I’m trying not to pay any attention. I’m not exactly having an aesthetic paradigm shift, but it’s enough of a problem to make me analyze what will make me feel “accomplished” as a composer (or even simply as a human being). It’s kind of like survivor’s guilt for post-graduates.

There is much to be said on this topic, but at the moment nobody has the wherewithal to begin to think about approaching the idea of how to initiate the discussion.

Anywho, moving swiftly on… Logic Pro 7 and Giga Studio simply do not want to work. I will deal with this very soon. I talked for a dude for almost an hour, trying to figure this problem out. Also, I do need to get back to editing all the parts for Volition, my infamous orchestral thesis. I might as well get the thing ready to send out at a moment’s notice. That piece will be performed someday.

Yeah, right. And I’m a Chinese jet pilot.

Anyway, as I said, I have decided to take a guilt-free break from composition for the next several weeks. One of the reasons is simply for the sake of temporary prioritizing. I need to focus on more pressing concerns… like gearing up for the April karate clinic, finding an escape from financial purgatory, and playing video games. That’s right, pressing concerns. I’ll compose again in May. Again, there are many, many, many reasons… but when you get right down to it, I don’t really owe anyone an explanation.

Tonight, in an effort to get my money’s worth out of my dormant video game collection, I am going to start a new game on Final Fantasy VI on PS1. Originally an SNES game, this was re-released on PS1 years ago, and I’m just now getting around to it. Ah, it’s one of my favorites. I haven’t played it in years, but I spent most of middle school learning every single little secret to it. Spring is the perfect time to revisit this game. It’s yet another distraction to keep me from starting Final Fantasy X-2.

“Every time you play Final Fantasy X-2, Ann Coulter eats a kitten.”
--Julio Appling

So, the wheel of fortune is stuck in the mud, and we each look to someone else to get out and start pushing the car. Need a pick-me-up? Need to get your mojo back before you figure out how to grab life by the balls? Need to let the freshness of the season inspire you to get out of your rut, take back control, and kick some ass?

I’m not going to say any more. I’ll just let the mix speak for itself:

1) The Battle – The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe
2) The White Tree – The Return of the King
3) Under the Stars – The Lion King
4) Launch – Treasure Planet
5) Red Warrior – The Last Samurai
6) Liberi Fatali – Final Fantasy VIII
7) Jack Sparrow – Dead Man’s Chest
8) Battle on the Asteroid – Battlestar Galactica (season one)
9) My Name Is Lincoln – The Island
10) A New Hope and End Credits – Revenge of the Sith