Static Warp Bubble
The office is running on a skeleton crew. Apparently there are only three of us left. One in each department. Nobody seems to even acknowledge that the missing people ever existed. I saw this happen once in Star Trek: TNG. I'm getting creeped out here... pretty soon it's just going to be me.
posted by the warrior bard at 9:17 AM
13 Comments:
I worked in a book bindery once with Static Bubble Wrap.
Monday, February 05, 2007 11:58:00 AM
Also, how do you know you're not already the only one there? Perhaps you created everyone else to prove your own existence. I suppose once everyone was gone there would be no one left to prove that you're here.
Monday, February 05, 2007 12:01:00 PM
We are sorry no one is in the office to answer your call. If you leave a voicemail, we will get back to you as soon as possible. To leave a message for Tim, press 1.
Monday, February 05, 2007 12:21:00 PM
"1"
Monday, February 05, 2007 11:17:00 PM
Thank you for pressing "1". Your call is very important to us. Please listen to the following menu options as they have recently changed:
If you would like to return to Static Warp Bubble, Press 1
If you would like to speak to a customer service representative, Press 2
If you would like to schedule a coffee enema, Press 3
If you are calling for hardware support, Press 5
If you are calling for support for you flacid manhood, please, hang-up and try playing with it for a while. If that does not help, admit you're gay and just be happy with who you are.
For all other options, go fuck yourself
Thank you
Tuesday, February 06, 2007 6:07:00 AM
"3"...
My poo smells like medium roast...
Tuesday, February 06, 2007 10:28:00 AM
beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!
Tuesday, February 06, 2007 10:52:00 AM
"Want to trade sandwiches, Calvin?"
"No, I've got my favorite kind. What did you bring?"
"Peanut butter."
"I have processed mouse loaf."
"Oh, gross. That's not really mouse loaf. It looks like egg salad."
"Taste it and see. Here, I think this is a whisker. It's good."
Tuesday, February 06, 2007 12:56:00 PM
Thank you for choosing "GO FUCK YOURSELF".
Please bend over...
...now!
Wednesday, February 07, 2007 6:43:00 AM
"It's like a little boy's nursery school I've come upon here."
Wednesday, February 07, 2007 8:17:00 AM
Look at it this way: you get to have the last word.
Except for that. And that. And that and that and that and that...
Sunday, February 11, 2007 1:31:00 PM
It's mine.
Monday, February 12, 2007 12:49:00 PM
Word.
Monday, February 12, 2007 1:21:00 PM
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