No Ticket

As you may have noticed, lately I haven’t had much incentive to blog. I’m usually too busy to craft anything with depth or feeling, so I go for the lowest common denominator just to maintain my readers’ interest with new material.

And then that backfires, too.

Here’s a little reminder for you: sometimes you don’t realize this if you aren’t part of the circle, but dark humor is a prominent feature here. Don’t fault me because you don’t have a sense of humor. Listen to some stand-up comedy by Lewis Black, Denis Leary, and George Carlin, and then talk to me about your feelings.

Ugh. Some people…

Look. If you are so presumptuous as to characterize my personality yet don’t actually know me but read the blog because you found a link on Facebook or something, then you are just about the shallowest person imaginable.

Before you judge people, you should actually, I don’t know, at least meet them in person. Yeah. That usually helps. Think about that the next time you are sitting on the toilet and realize that your shit stinks, too. You know who you are. Of course you do. If you are reading this and never had the pleasure of shaking my hand, I’m probably fucking talking to you.

This is my blog. The dark humor will continue. Take it with a grain of salt. If you don’t know me, then yes I’m sure my posts can get a little jarring, but then again, if you don’t know me WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET A LIFE!

If you aren’t my friend, you can’t possibly grasp the context of anything you find on this blog and should therefore not complain, much less judge. If you don’t know me, you simply DO NOT BELONG HERE SO STOP READING.

“Deagle Deagle Deagle” and “Penny For Your Thoughts” were intended to be humorous. You may have not laughed, but you weren’t the target audience, then, were you? You have three choices: 1) go away; 2) get to know me; 3) get a sense of humor if not context.

I guess some people just aren’t keen enough to know what it is that they’re reading. This is partly why I haven’t been blogging as much lately. And fuck the voyeuristic Facebook friends-in-common junkies for trying to ruin our fun here with snap judgments. I have friends to entertain.

Penis cock fart suck fuck balls. There. Happy? Is that low-brow enough for you? Oh, is that too hostile? I’m sorry, then, what I really meant so say was fuck off.

Never crash a private party.